After the pies and pina coladas: An insider's take on preseason

Premier League / Frank Gregan / 17 July 2008 / Leave a Comment

Pre-season is a time for camaraderie, pranks and vomiting over advertising hoarding. But it's vital to make a good start and Frank Gregan knows who he expects to be top come the end of August.

In the last 15 years the changes to our national game have been almost immeasurable. The improvements to stadiums, the structuring of academies, the floating of a club's stock and of course the huge sums of money that now change hands in transfer fees and player's remunerations.

As part of their pre-season training, Premier League players will be conditioning their muscles and expanding their lung capacity in the Far East and Dubai while their Conference counterparts will be visiting army camps and using university facilities.

It is of little consequence whether you are overlooking golden sands or a military red brick wall whilst your lungs are preparing to explode. The pain is the same and it is not a great deal of fun. Pre-season training is something that the vast majority of players dread yet enjoy the sense of achievement once it is completed. It is a time of great camaraderie, players meeting up again after their break and new squad members joining. It can also be a time for pranks and the new boys normally get the brunt of it.

The days of players going away for an eight week break and coming back with pie crumbs around their lips and a physique like Johnny Vegas are long gone. Weights are taken prior to the players dispersing and body fat is measured. It is the body fat measurement which is the best indication of what kind of a summer the player has enjoyed and fines are applied to those who have had a pina colada or four too many.

Alcohol is a major problem during the summer. The professionalism at all levels of football these days is such that during the course of a season very little is consumed. Paul McGrath would no longer be able to turn up with breath that intoxicated his opponent and walk off with the Man of the Match award. Consequently if players do overdo the drinking during the summer, even only slightly, it tends to show up both in the weight and body fat tests.

As a Conference manager I always tried to get the players away for a long weekend the week before the season began. It allows them to work hard and to bond. We had a great training facility just outside Rotterdam and we would double session on the Friday, morning session on the Saturday and play a local side on the Saturday afternoon. On the Saturday night I would allow them to enjoy themselves with the promise of a "beasting" session at 10 am on the Sunday morning. I would warn them if they over indulged they would pay for it the next morning. Still, men will be men and there would be a hefty percentage of them leaning over the advertising hoardings at the training ground saying hello to the previous night's lager at 10.45 am.

One of the most bizarre incidents I ever had with an opposition manager was during pre-season in Rotterdam. My chairman had arranged the game through a business contact and our opponents turned out to be the Dutch equivalent of the Dog and Duck.

We beat them 15-0. At the end of the game their manager was having a right go at the referee because he thought the ninth goal was offside. I tried to explain to him that it was unlikely to have had a drastic effect on the outcome of the game but he would have none of it.

I remember the same Chairman arranged for us to play Manchester United during pre-season at home. We had a full house and beat them 5-1. I think our supporters were a little disappointed with the side United fielded, they were that young we had to give them rusks at half time.

Arsenal's preparations are always spot on and I think they will once again hit the ground running. A back at [3.75] should be achievable for them to be top at the end of August. I think that is a prospect well worth considering.