Winner Stays On / Jamie "The Pacman" Pacheco / 21 January 2011 /

Read on to find out why Dave is more Dangerous than he at first seemed, this week's selections and why the vet bill for the dead budgie was so big.

So Dangerous Dave is quite dangerous after all. Maybe not in the 'I live life on the edge' Charlie Sheen sort of way; more in the 'cheeky bugger is on two wins in a row and if he wins another three we're in danger of having to pay out another £100' sort of way.

Tied after the first two matches this week, it all come down to Lazio's match against Sampdoria. Dangerous Dave liked Lazio, his opponent was all over the 'both teams to score' selection. In essence a dogfight between the two for the right to stay on. Except it was a clean one, unlike the vile operation famously championed by Michael Vick a few years back. A bit of snarling went on between the two, maybe even a growl or two and a flash of some sharp gnashers but nothing more aggressive than that. Lazio won with a late goal and Dangerous Dave re-affirmed his position as Winner Stays On's resident top dog.

And speaking of canines, here's my favourite joke.

A woman takes her budgerigar to the vet who examines it, listens for a heartbeat and tells her:

"Sorry Mam but we've lost this one, nothing I can do".

"What? He's dead? He can't be, can I at least get a second opinion?"

The vet nods, whistles and a golden Labrador runs into the room. The vet places the budgie on a bed and signals towards the dog. He jumps up, paws at it a little bit, puts his ear to its heart and then looks at the pair of them with big, sad eyes and shakes his head.

"You see?" says the vet.

The woman isn't convinced though and wants further confirmation. The vet smacks his lips together quickly and a cat runs into the room. He jumps onto the bed, sniffs around, rubs its head against the budgie and then looks at them and meaows, slowly and solemnly.

"There you go. Not much more I can say" quips the vet.

The woman is finally convinced and asks for the bill so she can get out of there and go about organising the funeral. The vet punches some numbers into a calculator, writes down the total on a piece of paper and hands it to the woman.

"What? £350 just to tell me my budgie is dead?"

"Well Mam, that much I told you myself but with the lab test and the cat scan..."

Scanning the markets and eager to pass this week's test is challenger IF Only.

This week's matches:

Aston Villa v Man City
Aldershot v Crewe
Beira Mar v Porto

Dangerous Dave's selections

Aston Villa v Man City - Back Over 3.5 goals at 3.55
Aldershot v Crewe - Back Crewe to win at 2.74
Beira Mar v Porto - Back Over 2.5 goals at 1.88

If Only's selections

Aston villa v Man City - Back Man City to score in both halves at 3.15
Aldershot v Crewe - Back Over 2.5 goals at 1.81
Beira Mar v Porto - Back Porto clean sheet at 1.95

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