Players Under The Microscope / Gary Speed / 12 October 2007 /

Gary Speed on the truth behind why he left his coaching role, getting back into the team and the international retirement of El Hadji Diouf

It has been, to say the least, a difficult week. I've got to be honest when I say I was totally surprised to learn I wasn't in the Bolton team that was picked to play Chelsea. But I never imagined what would come next. Of course I was disappointed, but the way things have come out makes it looks as if I threw my toys out of the pram. That's never been my way and I wouldn't have started now.

I suppose the nature of the attention on the Premier League these days is that every little situation gets blown up with all sorts of gossip. Just look at everything that's happened around Michael Owen this week with people trying to create tensions between him and Newcastle. I guess I've had the same thing on a smaller scale with people looking for conspiracies behind all that has happened with me at Bolton, but honestly, they weren't there.

The simple truth is a lot more boring. When Sammy Lee asked me to be his first team coach we all went into the plan with the very best of intentions. But I think this week has probably brought it home that it wasn't going to work out right because I am so keen to carry on playing. I've said before that at 38 I want to make the very most of whatever time I've got left and that hasn't changed. After some discussions between myself and Sammy, I decided it was ultimately going to be the best for me, for the club and the team if I stepped down from any coaching role. It was my decision.

I've always given 100 per cent as a player throughout my career and I always will do. The moment I feel I can't do that or don't want to do that I'll hang up my boots and forget about it, but I certainly don't feel like that now.

With that in mind I'm getting myself focused on training and playing hard to try to get back into the team. I didn't have a problem with being left out - even though of course I didn't like it - because I've always respected the fact it's the manager's right to pick the team he thinks is best for the club. I've been in the game a long time and it's not the first time it's happened to me. I've always tried to work my way back properly before and that's what I'll do this time as well.

Managers, of course, have to make decisions. And the higher the profile of the club you are in charge of the more debate there is. To illustrate the point, Steve McClaren has got a few big choices this weekend as he tries to make sure England get over the line to qualify for Euro 2008.

I'll be interested to see which way he goes on whether to leave out Ashley Cole and Rio Ferdinand from tomorrow's team at Wembley. Both are on a yellow card - as is Joe Cole - and the thinking is to make sure they can't be suspended for the really big game in Russia. It looked as if he would have to make the same call over John Terry but now it seems a knee injury has made the decision for him. I think it would probably be the right call to rest one or both of the others, though. England are well blessed with other central defenders and you'd like to think whoever is at the back won't be too overworked anyway. I know the opposite argument - that you concentrate on winning the game in front of you before you think about the next one - but on this occasion the Russian trip is massive and I'd be inclined to make sure nothing was left to chance for it.

One selection I'm not so sure about is to keep picking Paul Robinson. There's no doubt he's a great goalkeeper but at the moment he's had a few high profile blunders and his confidence is bound to be low. I'm not England manager and thankfully Steve McClaren is the one who has to take that call - but I do think the rule for every position at international level should be to pick people who are in form for their clubs and on that basis I'd definitely go for David James. I think the goalkeeper is a key position in any team and if he's full of confidence it spreads outwards. England are lucky to have so much choice, I suppose. I like Scott Carson as well, and although I've not seen too much of Robert Green, the reports on him are pretty positive. I also reckon Steve Harper at Newcastle has been unlucky. He was excellent in the first six of seven matches and if he'd not had to sit out for the return of Shay Given I reckon he could have been in with a shout for England as well.

England are pretty unbackable at 1.09 to beat Estonia, but I do think odds of 6.2 for the draw at half time and then an England win are worth looking at. I'd fancy backing Michael Owen to score if I could get anything like evens because he clearly has a point to prove.

As for Wales, the fact that Craig Bellamy has declared himself fit is a good sign. The time was that even an away game with Cyprus meant an automatic three points but they have improved dramatically. But providing Bellamy does start I'd think 2.78 is a very good price for another Welsh away win to follow up last month's terrific trip to Slovakia.

Finally I've been asked about El Hadji Diouf's decision to retire from international football. At 26 - or at least that's what age he claims to be! - my Bolton team mate is a lot younger than I was when I hung up my Welsh boots. But he's made the decision in his own mind after some problems with the Senegal FA and it's definitely good news for Bolton. He's looked really bright for us on the wing so far this season and got in some great crosses for Nic Anelka - he just needs a goal of his own now to boost his confidence a bit. Hopefully that might come against Arsenal next weekend.

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