Football Food For Thought / Mike Norman / 04 July 2008 /

"Mystical" Mike Norman looks at the role parents play as kids develop from loving to play the game into looking to make a career out of it. Decisions need to be made and back-up plans need to be in place but this isn't always the case.

It doesn't seem that long ago that being a professional footballer was no more lucrative than having a 'uniform' job. Growing up kids wanted to be a policeman or a firefighter, or be an 'army man' as I used to call it. In fact, back then (and I'm talking about just 25 years ago), football was just a hobby, something we did after the homework was done, and something that our parents rarely got involved in.

I grew up with a lad called Lee Todd, who later went on to play professional football for Stockport, Southampton (in the Premier League), Bradford and Rochdale. I have very fond memories of that stage of my life, mainly due to the fact that we (that's myself, Toddy and a few other mates) had a special bond. We never fell out, which is unusual for teenagers, we just hung around together, played football, went swimming, watched videos, and as we got older we drank together and even dated the same girls - though not at the same time!

Toddy was always the better footballer, and you could see from a very early age that he had what it takes to be a professional. Yet his parents never interfered with his enjoyment as a teenager, they never once pushed him into doing something he didn't want to do or prevented him from doing something he did want to do. He was a well mannered intelligent lad and his parents trusted his judgment.

During the course of the last 20 years football has changed dramatically, none more so than from a financial point of view. Thanks to Sky Television, and the creation of the Premier League, a job as a professional footballer suddenly meant fame and fortune - and the role of the parent changed forever.

I have an eight year old son called Lewis who is football mad, and as a parent I know I'm going to have to make some decisions that may not seem right at the time, but prove to be the correct ones in the long term.

At the moment Lewis loves reading about and watching football more than he does playing it, but at some point he is going to ask me about him being allowed to join a junior football team. It's my responsibility to make the right decision on his behalf and whether I allow him to join a team or not will depend on at what age he asks me. Personally, at eight years old I think he is too young - he is in a good school, that employ a couple of football coaches to come in every Friday to teach the kids some basics before organising a mini game for them to enjoy. He doesn't need to be running around a full sized pitch with the majority of the parents on the sidelines having a win-at all-costs attitude.

As the kids get older the decisions become tougher. Because of the money that is now in game clubs all over the country have scouts at almost every level of junior football. It never used to be like this; it used to be that a few scouts would go and watch the local under-15's or under-16's, and if they spotted a talented player they would offer him a place on the government funded Youth Training Scheme. Nowadays, scouts can be seen at games involving much younger players. Their job is to get promising players signed up as early as possible so that they can't be signed by rival clubs.

The knock-on affect is that a lot more teenagers are being signed by clubs only to never make it as a professional, and left with no education, their life is in tatters. As a parent, it must be such a proud moment to be told that your teenage son has what it takes to be a professional footballer, but as a parent, it's also your responsibility to get the right advice and to make the right decisions on his behalf.

As your son gets older and his football develops, the club he is signed to will dictate to you more and more. They will tell you their dietary preferences and they will tell you what your son can and can't do. Imagine telling a teenager that he mustn't go to Burger King with his mates because 'the club' doesn't want him to, or that he can't go to the cinema with his young female friend because he shouldn't be getting distracted by relationships. Try telling him that you would much rather he concentrates on his school work so that he can get the grades required to go to university.

As I said earlier, a parent with a talented footballer in the family will face some tough decisions. Two million kids reportedly play junior football in this country - there are approximately just 600 professional footballers in the Premier League. I hope I've given you something to think about.

The FA have a lot of excellent advice for parents; https://www.thefa.com/GrassrootsNew/Parent/

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