Football Food For Thought / Frank Gregan / 20 February 2008 /

Legendary Non-League manager Frank Gregan on half-time jaffa cakes, chubby referees and shedding the pounds at White Hart Lane

"You've never seen a salad!" I've heard that sung so many times at games I've been involved in, usually directed at one of the bigger boned members of the playing staff. A glance towards the crowd in the direction of the leader of the chorus normally reveals a physique that makes Jimmy "five bellies" look like Kate Moss with the trots. Kettle, pot and black is wasted on the masses! I've heard a few corkers though, I remember on a Boxing Day during a typical 'gum shield in, visor down' type of local derby some wag screaming at a rotund striker, 'you're meant to carve the turkey before you eat it!' It eased the tension and brought a smile to all.

Spurs fitness coach Marcos Alvarez says the squad was seventeen stone overweight when they took over. After introducing some common sense guidelines in the club canteen and advising the players where to exercise control in their personal diet he claims to have got the squad back in shape. It's easier than that Mr. Alvarez, as Liverpool proved in 1995 when their squad lost eighteen stone in a day. They released Jan Molby!

Over the years I've seen and been a part of all the changes. I have no doubt that they are all for the good and benefit of the individual and consequently, the team. Of course every club in the Premier League has its own fitness coach and nutritionist so the likelihood of gaining an edge is virtually non existent. However, if you don't employ these people your club runs the risk of falling behind the standards set by the others. This according to Ramos and Alvarez is what had happened at Spurs and there can be little doubt that the players look sharper and fitter under the new regime. None more so than Jermaine Jennas who has been an absolute revelation of late.

As you head down the leagues the attention to detail becomes less focused but everyone continues to try to do the right thing. Diet sheets being passed out by physios are common place. Weighing sessions with fines on an upward scale for every pound over the optimum weight as determined by the staff are regular occurrences. The Christmas period is particularly hard and I have stood by my physio as he weighed players in on Boxing Day with the other vitally important deterrent in my hand. The breathalyzer. If food is the enemy then booze is Satan. It's not only the calorific content, it is also the general effect it has on the players' well being. You cannot play football with a hangover. I know all about Best, Osgood, Worthington and Alan Hudson, how many of those went on to play into their mid thirties? I'm from that generation and I have headed a ball whilst seeing three of them and wishing I had stayed in the night before. The difference is in those days every team had a few who liked a sherbet. Not nowadays though, the standards of professionalism are at a different level.

Referees need to keep an eye on the weight too, Mark Halsey chasing Jermaine Pennant is a sight for sore eyes! Players pick up on these things so quickly. I was in the tunnel at Rushden and Diamonds a few years back with both the teams lined up ready to go. The referee was portly to say the least and to be honest I half expected him to start having contractions. We were waiting on the second assistant referee to come out. 'Where's the other lino?' I asked my skipper. Quick as a flash he nodded at the referee 'Don't know, but I reckon he might have ate him!"

Half times have changed dramatically. Twenty years ago a cigarette was not out of the question. Recently my changing rooms have been full of Jaffa Cakes, Jelly Babies and Sugar Coated Beans. I sometimes expect one of the players to say "stuff the team talk, anybody got any crisps?!' No wonder half times now last nearly twenty minutes, it's so as to avoid indigestion! But again, we all do it and failure to do so might, it just might, give the opposition an edge.

So how do we make a profit from this newly slimmed down Spurs squad? There are a couple of bets that catch the eye. The one I am particularly fond of is the [7.6] available on them to lift the UEFA Cup. The other one that I keep looking at and wondering if I should explore the possibility of a second mortgage in order to fund it, is a top six finish. I think it likely you could tempt a match at [9.4] and quite frankly that has got to be a brilliant lay for those with deep pockets and strong hearts. The chances of Spurs attaining those dizzy heights are nil, even if they employed Dwayne Chamber's nutritionist!

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