Football Food For Thought / Dan Fitch / 16 September 2008 /

Dan "The Betting Man" Fitch on why your second (or third) spells are never as good as your first. Just ask Keegan or Rush.

They say that in life you should never go back. Once you've moved on from a situation, going back to it is always fraught with danger.

Like most clichés there is a huge element in truth in this. Anyone that has ever left home to go to university and then post-graduation had to return to live with their parents, will know the tensions that arise. You can't really skin up in the living room for a start.

It's true in relationships also. You go back because of the things you missed; generally the sex and having someone to go to the cinema with. What your mind conveniently filters out is all the things that made you split up in the first place; the arguments and the amount of time you ended up watching Gok Wan on telly.

Yes, from Harold Wilson to Dirty Den, going back for a second term just never seems to work as well as first time round. As ever, when it comes to clichés, football is willing and able to get in on the act. Whether it is managers or players, a return to an old stomping ground always seems to end badly.

Kevin Keegan is the obvious example. As stormy on/off relationships go, Keegan and Newcastle give Taylor and Burton a run for their money. The formally permed one is the current favourite in the next Newcastle manager market at [3.55], despite also being the last Newcastle manager.

Keegan has of course got form for walking out on the Magpies, only to return when things were back on his terms. Early on in his initial tenure, he stropped off, famously claiming that "It's not like it said in the brochure". A few days later he was back and but for an agent sending him that video of Faustino Asprilla, would have taken Newcastle to the Premier League title.

Many years later and Mike Ashley shocked everyone, when devoid of any idea as to who could actually manage Newcastle successfully, he plumped for fans' favourite Keegan. Unfortunately, such was Keegan's desire to jump from one soccer circus to another, he didn't even bother to read the brochure this time round. If he had he might have been alarmed to read the passage which read, "Just sit back and relax when it comes to transfers, as our chirpy cockney barrow boys will do all the buying and selling for you".

It says a lot about Newcastle that it would surprise no one if Keegan did go back for his third (or is it fourth?) spell in charge. I feel a bit gutted at the moment that this season I have neglected to indulge in a bet that I've successfully traded from for the past three seasons. Namely, backing Newcastle to be relegated and then laying off as their season freefalls into disaster. The Magpies can currently be backed at [9.6] for the drop.

Keegan is not the only manager to try to turn back the clock. Howard Kendall was also seemingly attached to the Everton hotseat with a length of elastic. Kendall took over the reigns at Goodison on three occasions, with the laws of diminishing returns applying.

Players are not exempt either. When Ian Rush returned to Liverpool after the shock of finding that Juventus was based in a foreign country, he found that his strike partner Dalglish was now confined to wearing a ludicrously sized coat in the dugout. Rush failed to form the sort of partnership with either Beardsley, Aldridge, Clough or Fowler, that would see a return to the days when he was the deadliest goalscorer around.

As with every rule, there are some exceptions. Peter Beardsley was fantastic on his return to Newcastle and Teddy Sheringham was still a class act during his second spell at White Hart Lane. One player who I think will flourish on his recent return to home turf is Sunderland's George McCartney.

McCartney is a very consistent player and should comfortably fill the left back position which was something of a problem last season for Roy Keane. He was good enough for Alan Curbishley to resign over his sale and should improve Sunderland's defence. The Mackems are [7.6] to be relegated, but I expect them to stay up quite comfortably. If there's one place Roy Keane won't want to return to, it's the Championship.

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