Features / Dan Fitch / 09 February 2011 /

With the Cheltenham Festival soon upon us, Dan Fitch looks at some of horse racing's funniest commentaries.

Of all the sports to commentate on, horse racing is surely the most difficult. Firstly, the action is rather frenetic, ensuring that all racing commentators have to talk incredibly fast and secondly, a lot of the horses have stupid names.

Hopefully the TV commentary at the Cheltenham Festival will be more successful than these examples. Here are five funny horse racing commentaries.

5. He who smelt it, dealt it

If Bart Simpson had a horse it would be called Hoof Hearted. Say it quickly enough and you'll find out why, or alternatively just listen to this commentator having to deal with the most childishly named horse in racing.

4. Open wide and say 'Arrrrr'

Here's another horse who was clearly given a name to annoy commentators, but the US announcer Tom Durkin instead decides to embrace the madness.

3. Now where did I put my voice?

We imagine that the ultimate nightmare for any TV commentator is to lose their voice whilst on air. For this harness racing commentator it became a horrifying reality, as his disappearing voice struggles to keep up with the action.

2. Does she or doesn't she?

What happens in a horse race that lines up with a ride named My Wife Knows Everything, alongside another called The Wife Doesn't Know? The result is that the commentator sounds like he's in two minds as to whether his wife has discovered his affair.

1. Over to Alan...

Finally we give you a commentary this is intentionally funny, rather than accidentally. Back in his days as a sports reporter, Alan Partridge describes the action from Sandown.

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