England Cricket / Frank Gregan / 18 August 2008 /

In other sports it is considered to be wit, banter or repartee but in cricket it's called sledging, frowned upon and considered not to be in the spirit of the game. Why are the authorities so uptight? asks Frank Gregan.

I can't imagine why the authorities would want to stamp out verbal goading between players. But understand their concerns that it could lead to something far more damaging. The problem is that the guy who is generally on the receiving end of the abuse is armed with a bat which may well be described in court one day as "the blunt instrument used to impart the blow to the back of the head m'lord!"

Insults in the sporting arena invariably revolve around three main topics: wives, physique and ability. Physique and ability usually provoke little response other than a quick retort but most men tend to get fired up when their nearest and dearest is the subject of derision. There are some classics, one of my favourites was the greeting that Rodney Marsh gave to Ian Botham as he took his place at the crease during an Ashes match. "How's your wife and my kids!"

Apparently Botham took it well (what goes around comes around) but others are not so gracious and are better at giving than receiving. Glenn McGrath tried to rile Sarwan with a sexual jibe during a match in Antigua in 2003 to which Sarwan replied with a quick retort that made reference to McGrath's wife. "If you ever mention my wife again I'll rip your throat out!" was the gist of McGrath's witty riposte which also contained a number of expletives. The incident was reported by the umpires as not being in the spirit of the game!

However, some were just so witty that even McGrath had to laugh. Zimbabwe's number eleven, Eddo Brandes couldn't get near to the ball as McGrath beat the bat and missed the stumps three times on the spin. Frustrated, McGrath advanced down the wicket and sneered, "Why are you so fat?" Quick as a flash Brandes replied "Because every time I make love to your wife she gives me a biscuit!" The Australian fielders all burst out laughing because there is only one thing funnier than watching an opponent take a verbal beating and that is watching a team-mate get one!

Some talk the talk while others walk the walk. Shortly after having made his debut in Pakistan, Sachin Tendulkar was taking a young Mushtaq Ahmed apart hitting two sixes in an over. Quick to defend his protégé, Abdul Qadir challenged Tendulkar, "Why are you attacking the kid, try and hit me!" Tendulkar said nothing but obliged during Qadir's next over hitting, 6, 0, 4, 6, 6, 6!

There is not a great deal of love lost between the two respective captains of England and South Africa who lock horns in a Twenty20 clash on Wednesday although both have tried very hard not to add fuel to the fire recently and have kept the sledging to a minimum. The appointment of Kevin Pietersen seems to have invigorated the English and a match at odds of around [2.2] should be available on the home side to be triumphant.

A former England favourite, Darren Gough, gave an insider's viewpoint on sledging a while ago whilst quizzed how he managed not to be intimidated by the Australian fast bowlers as they walked down the wicket and glared at him. "What can he do?" said Gough, "he can't just walk up to me and hit me can he?" As long as that ethic remains in tact then long may sledging continue.

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