Britain's Got Talent / Mike Norman / 16 May 2011 /

Our man Mike Norman ignored the lure of Eurovision on BBC, and instead stayed loyal to the show that he loves in order to give us his views on the latest crop of acts to put their talent on the line.

When a one-eyed man in his sixties arrives on stage, balances a dozen or so yellow buckets on his head whilst patting his flabby stomach, and gets through to the next stage of Britain's Got Talent, then you know you're in for a bizarre evening.

I knew at that precise moment that I should have switched over to Eurovision, but with the intolerable Jedward about to addle the German crowd, and with me needing my plasma TV to be in fully working condition for the sporting weeks ahead, I decided to stick with lunatic Britain. Mind you, the next act on stage - Britney Spears-wannabe Lorna Bliss - certainly got my blood flowing for reasons other than just anger!

In all fairness Saturday's BGT picked up a little after its crazy and head-shaking start, with acts like Jai McDowall, Circus of Horrors, Two and a Half Men, and The Highwaymen all impressing to a certain extent.

I'll start with the sane - Jai McDowall that is - before I talk about the crazy. If we're being honest with ourselves, Susan Boyle has virtually killed off the surprise, head-turning moment that you get when someone really good performs, but with McDowall there was still a sense of wow about him. I knew he was going to be good, but unlike Boris Becker in a broom cupboard, this theatre-style singer got better the longer he performed. He was incredibly nervous, but thankfully his talent shone through and all three judges - and myself for that matter - agreed that he had a wonderful, powerful and emotional voice. Put him in your notebook for certain.

I'm not sure what to make of Circus of Horrors. They are one of those acts that you need to watch a few times so that you can take everything in; and one of those acts that you see every year at festivals up and down the country, or ironically, at a circus!

That's not to say they aren't entertaining because they are, and I'd much rather go and see this act than the very good, but now ultra-boring Spellbound (last year's winners). I'm just not totally convinced that Circus of Horrors are potential winners. True, if you're looking for an act that can provide variety entertainment for one night in front of the Royal Family - as is the purpose of BGT - then this could be it, but if you want someone to be on our TV screens for the longer term then I'm of the opinion that we should be looking elsewhere.

And I'm not saying that we should be looking at Two and a Half Men either, though I have to admit there was something very likeable about this trio of acrobatic-style dancers - even if they did remind me of school children at a blue coloured Smarites knees-up.

I just can't help but feel that Two and a Half Men - so called because one of the members is much smaller than the other two - should be doing their front flips through a ring of fire, or perhaps back-flipping over a wall covered in sharp broken glass. It will certainly make their performance more entertaining. In fact, merge Two and a Half Men with last week's star performers Girls Roc and you will have the ultimate variety act; not to mention a few homemade Barbie Dolls in nine months time!

Last on stage on Saturday were The Highwaymen, and I'm sorry but I have to agree with judges Amanda Holden and Michael McIntyre on this one. Basically they were boring as hell. Good at what they do - which is beating drums by the way - yes, but being entertaining, come off it. I haven't got a clue what the Glaswegian audience were on, but if some of the women up there are that easily pleased then I know where my next night out will be.

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