If you want to know about Scott Johnson, then a story from 2004 seems as good a character reference as any. The Aussie who is now Scotland's head rugby coach outraged New Zealanders by describing their country as "a poxy little island in the Pacific."
When the storm his comments created wouldn't go away, he decided to clarify his views by issuing an apology. "Sorry," it said. "New Zealand is actually TWO poxy islands in the Pacific." Several people have compared Johnson to Dame Edna Everage and it isn't hard to see why.
Given that background it is fair to assume that the 51-year-old from Sydney will not be too bothered about the wave of criticism that's washing over Scottish rugby since his side's miserable performance against England at Murrayfield last weekend. It was so bad there have been serious calls for the Scots to be flung out of the Six Nations and Georgia brought into their place.
That seems a flawed argument. The reality is that it is the coach who needs to be sacked rather than the entire country. Johnson made a series of bizarre calls in his team selection, including dropping captain Kelly Brown (61 caps) and then complaining that the team he did pick were naïve in their decision making.
After that his tactics were even more peculiar. He substituted his best player David Denton. And he told Duncan Weir to kick as often as he could and as quickly - which meant the fly-half simply fed England's rookie back line with exactly the sort of possession they needed. The stats show the back three of Mike Brown, Jonny May and Jack Nowell made 225 metres between them on a gluepot pitch full of worms that should have stopped anybody playing running rugby.
Johnson is due to step down from the job later in the year anyway, so after two dismal performances so far in the Six Nations with just six points scored and 48 conceded you might have thought the Scottish RFU would be keen to bring that change forward. Not so. Instead they issued a statement backing the management and merely suggesting that they "share the supporters' sense of disappointment and frustration at the results and performances."
Next up for the Scots is a trip to Rome, where an Italian team who have begun the competition by losing two away games are always transformed into a far tougher proposition. I went to check the match odds thinking that the Scots might be an interesting bet at long odds - instead they are a ridiculously short 2.568/5 and if anything shouts "lay" at you, then that does.
Italy beat both Ireland and France on their own patch last year and will be looking at the Scots as a golden opportunity to reprise some of the fire and passion that brought those results. They will know that a demoralised team are there for the taking if they can win some battles in the forwards early on - and that the fixture is a huge chance to build morale.
The winning margin market is not yet properly formed, but an Italian win by more than 12.5 points is currently priced between 5.59/2 and 10.519/2. As Dame Edna might say: "Thank you, Possums".