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I'd Do Anything Betting: Jodie the likely Nancy after week one

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Paul Sorene wraps up the action from the first week of the BBC's latest talent show

Jodie is the favourite the win I'd Do Anything.

Jodie, [5.5] on the Betfair markets, has been on TV before, winning the 'The Biggest Loser' show.

No, not a televised talent contest to play Hale & Pace, rather a show wherein agonists competed to lose the most weight.

Open to one and all, the programme nonetheless favoured those of a heavier build. Jodie won after losing eight stone. If, say, the typical footballers' wife or model had tried the same thing, they would now weigh no more than a garden pea.

These are early days in the show of the show that is Oliver! and it will take a few more weeks' before the eventual winner become apparent. And Jodie is just ahead of Rachel, by mercy of the alphabet.

Rachel trained at the Royal Academy of Music and currently works for a company that employs out of work actors. She should give her business card out. There can be only one Nancy, and with 12 competitors, Rachel is in something of a win-win situation.

Rachel is followed in the pecking order by Samantha. Know that Samantha "recently entered a Maltese TV International Song competition and won".

You cannot do better than win. But how many people entered the contest and what Samantha had to do to win are not mentioned on the BBC's website. Anorak has, though, managed to track down the runner up, one Yoko Gates, whose rendition of On The Wings Or Love sounds uncannily like nails being dragged down a dry blackboard.

Samantha is in it to win it.

As is Jessie, a Nancy wannabe very likely to make it to the final three. The curly hair. The Irish accent. The smiling eyes. Jessie is like a young, permed Val Doonican. She's a shoo-in to do well.

For the Olivers, Chester is an early forerunner. Chester is 12-years-old. Chester is from Middlesex. Chester is so young that to comment on him seems cruel and unusual.

He's at an age when a boy's voice breaks and he goes to his bedroom for three years. Hormones could play no small part in deciding on which Oliver gets the nod.

Chester, we wish only well. As do we all the Olivers. But one of them has to win. And 11 have to lose.

Hang on: 12 boys; 11 losers; one chosen one.

It's Joseph all over again...