Obsession.
Marcus Bateman
/ Marcus Bateman / 29 August 2008 / Leave a comment
Poker can easily become a major part of your life once you start to take it seriously.
The combination of profitability, the rush of making successful plays, and the general recreational aspect of it can quickly make it a big influence on your behaviour. Thinking about what influence poker has on those around you is of just as much importance to your happiness as thinking about how outside events influence the profitability of your poker game.
As poker lends itself to being played in binges (in tournaments the player is unable to leave, while in cash games you want to stick with bad players for as long as possible) it can be a difficult game to integrate with a regular family life. It can also look extremely bad to people that don't understand poker if your behaviour seems odd because of poker.
I remember a particularly good example of this from when I went to meet a girlfriend's parents and stay with them for a few days. My girlfriend and I were sitting in her room and I was playing a few $100 sit and go's while she finished some work. I get to three handed in the last one and we are all very even on chips, with the blinds still very low.
Suddenly her parents announce that we have reservations in a restaurant and we need to leave immediately. Obviously I'm keen to try and win the tournament, but know full well that it will take at least half an hour with the stack sizes. In the end I got the worst of both worlds - I stalled for fifteen minutes, no one bust so I start open shoving and come third. Her parents are angry, I'm angry about not winning, and no one was happy.
The point of this story (apart from how to impress your in laws that is) is that when you embark on a session of poker, be really careful about what the situation around you is. Just as you should not play if you are angry or upset about something, so you should not play if it will anger or upset someone you care about. This is extremely difficult to do if you are a very serious player - you will often have to choose between spending time with your family and maximising your chances of providing for them (say in the case of staying with a rich fish all night and into the next morning). Be careful about choosing the right times to play poker - the chance of winning money may well cost you something else.
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