Holding the Nuts

Internet Poker / Editor / 19 February 2008 / Leave a Comment

Matt Broughton discovers that holding the nuts isn't always everything it's cracked up to be...

On a recent press event I was chuffed to finally get to interview a couple of my favourite poker personalities; namely Howard Lederer and Mike Matusow. The most interesting event of the day, however, came later that afternoon as I stood by the bar, shooting the breeze with a group of journalists. As we chatted away, I absent-mindedly clasped my hands behind my back just as - unbeknown to me - Phil Ivey had chosen that exact moment to squeeze between me and a pillar in the room. It's the sort of thing I couldn't have done if I'd tried, but I somehow managed to perfectly cradle Ivey's balls in my hands. Neither of us acknowledged the testicle cupping, but I immediately felt imbued with magical nut dust from the poker wizard's pods. I said my goodbyes (not shaking hands with anyone, obviously) and hurried home to log-on for some heads-up action. I won 7 out of 9 games: the mystical knackers of Ivey were indeed the source of all things good in poker. Frankly, I regretted not having rubbed them three times and making a wish.

Now it might strike some as an unorthodox approach to 'winning poker', but if you ever have the opportunity to fondle Ivey's balls before a big tournament, grab the opportunity with both hands. Literally.

I'd also made another observation as I walked out of the venue with fellow hack, Shelly Rubenstein. Ivey was climbing into a car just in front of us clutching a "How to Play Poker" supplement from one of the poker magazines. Shelly and I looked at each other in a 'did you see what I just saw?' way. "You'd think he was a bit beyond that." Shelly ventured. I agreed, and couldn't help thinking that if Phil Ivey spent a little less time reading poker supplements and more time with the 'family jewels' he'd be unstoppable.