Ben Herd / Ben Herd / 29 May 2009 / 3 Comments

In an emotional final column, Ben Herd reflects on love, loss and rejection as he bids farewell to Betting.Betfair and Shrewsbury Town...

Well, what a week it's been since I wrote my last piece!

Firstly, we went down to Wembley and got beaten in the play-off final, for the second time in three years, then as if I wasn't feeling down enough I end up being released from Shrewsbury Town; talk about how's your luck!

Let's start with the disappointment of Wembley. This time around the preparation was spot-on to be fair and all the lads were relaxed and really up for the game. The hotel we stayed in (The Grove, Watford) was absolutely fantastic; it is probably the sort of hotel that Premier League teams frequent regulary.

I even binned my long-time room mate, Kelvin, in favour of Omer Riza because when we roomed together for the trip to Bury we won - if it ain't broke...... However, I was gutted not to make the bench at the national stadium, the only comfort I could draw upon was that I had played there two years previously - scant consolation really!

I was most impressed with how Gillingham played, especially the first half. In particular Simon King, who had a wonderful game at the heart of the Gills defence and who I expect to benefit from playing in a higher league next season. Another aspect of Gillingham's play that I was impressed with was their movement off the ball and their work-rate to get on the ball - whenever one of their players had the ball they always seemed to have two or three options.

To concede in the last minute is always a massive sucker punch, obviously, and to lose for the second time in three years is hard to take.

As for getting released on Monday - well, what can I say? It hasn't completely sunk in yet. The thought of not pulling on the blue and amber shirt again - not running out in front of the Shrewsbury faithful - is something that I'm struggling to come to terms with.

I know players are ridiculed up and down the country for declaring their undying love for a club one minute then the next minute they are kissing another team's badge, but I do genuinely love the club and really appreciated what it meant to pull on the shirt, and to play in front of the Salop faithful.

I suppose my release was on the cards after failing to agree a new contract a few months back, then losing my place in the team. But it's never nice to be told that you're not wanted by the manager, even more so for myself because the manager must have rated me to have offered me a two-and-a-half year deal back in October.

The biggest disappointment for me was not getting the chance to say a proper goodbye to the fans. Football is a funny game and I would love to return to Salop in the future.

I count myself lucky to have been one of only a few to have played for Shrewsbury at The Gay Meadow, the new stadium and can take some fantastic memories from my time there. It is going to be a case of sitting by the phone and seeing if any clubs want to offer me anything. On the up side, a few clubs contacted me the very next day after my release to express their interest and I have gone to meet some of them.

The next club that I sign for has to be right for me; it is going to be the biggest desicion of my professional life and I am even more determined to prove to people that I can play at a higher level.

The next thing for me is to get myself on holiday. I am going to Spain and it's a chance to get away from it all, to refresh my body and mind and come back raring to go. One thing is for sure: I will definitely be taking my mobile with me! I think it is vitally important for players to get themselves away in the close season, to take a break and just switch off.

The season is a long one and you need to rest the joints and limbs otherwise you could end up not having a break at all, which could subsequently result in injuries later on in the season.

I would like to end this piece and my articles for betting.betfair by saying a massive thank you to all those who have read my articles throughout the season.

I would also like to say a massive thank you to the the Shrewsbury fans that have shown so much fantastic support to me during my time at the club. As I say, I would one day like to pull on the blue & amber shirt again!