England Cricket / Frank Gregan / 02 June 2008 / 1

It is some measure of the achievements of Andrew Flintoff that he appears to have banished press speculation looking for the "new Botham" once and for all. In its place, we now have the race to become the new Freddie. But who are the candidates? Frank Gregan looks into it.

We don't need another hero! Lawrence Dallaglio, who brought down the curtain on a spectacular rugby career at the weekend, was one of the choirboys who did the backing vocals for that Tina Turner track. It's a statement that I will always disagree with, we need our heroes and invariably we all have sporting ones.

They say you should never meet your hero, you'll only be disappointed. One of my sporting heroes that I knew vaguely in a social context was Ian Botham. Many moons ago I was stationed in Taunton whilst Sir Ian was hammering more square cuts than a T-Bone butcher and doing more swinging (the ball of course) than Tarzan! I make no bones about it, I was a hanger-on. I was a local footballer and as such I was on the edge of the social group on nights out because of a friendship between a team-mate of mine and Joel Garner. I was an anonymous member of the party, but it was impossible to become detached from the group because it didn't matter what pub or nightclub you were in Big Joel's head was visible above the crowd from any angle. He is the biggest man I have ever seen, he makes Chris Tremlett wearing stilts look like Ronnie Corbett!

I was not disappointed in my cricketing hero, the character they now call the "Sirloin of Beef!' Quite the opposite, he had a tremendous persona. It is so difficult to quantify what makes a sportsman truly great. I watched Botham on a number of occasions in big one-day games at Somerset, and to my recollection I don't think I ever saw him produce a match-winning performance. None of that ever taints my memory of his feats. Headingley in 1981 is the classic that we all recall but I also have fond memories from a little later on in his career.

Normal service had been resumed by 1989 and we were once again getting battered by the Aussies. England had lost the first two tests and in a weather affected third test looked likely to throw the game away when they were reduced to 75-5 in their first innings replying to the Australian total of 424. Botham had only just returned to the side but he made a gritty, time consuming 46 that ensured that the Australians would run out of time and end all hopes of an embarrassing whitewash. I was due to fly out to Australia to start a two year tour of duty with the Australian Army and even though I took up post on the back of a hiding I was grateful at least it was not the dreaded home whitewash!

I also remember when he returned from his ban for smoking cannabis and with his very first ball claimed another test wicket. Magic! One thing most people don't talk about was the very last delivery he ever bowled in professional cricket. It was for Durham against Australia to a tense David Boon, under pressure to keep his place in the test side. Botham unzipped his trousers and whipped out his tackle before the delivery. He ran up and delivered the ball with his manhood hanging out, Boon saw it and was grateful that the ball was off target, he was laughing so much he wouldn't have been able to play it! England will always want a Botham but I'm not sure that we produce them these days.

To be able to bat at test level is one heck of an achievement, to be able to bowl at test level is equally impressive. It is little wonder that genuine all rounders are so difficult to come by but it makes such a difference when one is in the side and firing on all cylinders. We do of course have Andrew Flintoff but four ankle operations, an injured left side and a thirty first birthday coming up in December points to the likelihood that we may have to look elsewhere. I hope we have one established before next years Ashes series.

I think it comes down to a choice of two. Dimitri Mascarenhas is a couple of months older than Flintoff but has yet to be given his chance at test level. Luke Wright has been promoted up the order in the ODI squad but again has yet to be considered for test duty. At twenty three he is certainly old enough if good enough. I'd like to see at least one of them on duty at some stage against South Africa. If the tales of Stuart Broad being raised as a batsman are true and he can find some form with the bat that earns him a promotion up the order we may already have an all rounder in situ.

It would be nice to go into the series against the Proteas on the back of a series win against New Zealand. In order to do so England have to avoid defeat in the third test starting on Thursday. Odds of [7.2] are available on the Black Caps if you think they will win the game and consequently draw the series. I find that tempting but I think that I'll be hedging my bets and laying England at [1.78] with a view to trading in play.

I was delighted for Dallaglio at the weekend. I had argued with a friend that he was wrong about him being a choirboy but had to eat humble pie when he sent me the link to watch him performing in the background to 'thunder thighs' herself. I'm just grateful the track wasn't Private Dancer, the big rugby player wouldn't look the best wrapped around a pole!

A note from the editor: to see Lawrence in full voice, follow this link. Here's a clue, it's at 3 mins and 48 secs. Unfortunately, no-one in the Betfair bunker has managed to spot him yet. See if you can do any better.

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1. Andrew Hughes | 02 June 2008

   Great article, very entertaining. I think Wright is the best candidate to replace Flintoff and it would be good to see him given a chance this summer.

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