International Cricket Bets: Judge players on how they perform rather than what they weigh

Bat and ball / Andrew Hughes / 24 March 2009 / Leave a Comment

From Shane Warne's premature retirement from Test cricket due to excessive fitness demands to Samit Patel's snub for being overweight, Andrew Hughes calls for pragmatism in picking players on their merits, best demonstrated by New Zealand's inclusion of Jesse Ryder.

Chennai Super Kings have a player on their books called Napoleon Einstein, who, if he ever makes it to the Indian team will officially have the finest moniker in international cricket. Until then, that particular title will remain with the spaghetti Western hero and occasional cricketer, the mighty Jesse Ryder. Like all heroes, he's had his battles, though rather than dangerous outlaws, Jesse has been going up against bottles of rum, glass windows and doughnut shops.

I wasn't around in the sixties when the gargantuan Colin Milburn was smashing all comers to various parts of Northampton and I wasn't around to witness the immense W G Grace refusing to bend down to pick up the ball at point as the ground was too far away. But from what I've read and heard, Ryder's penchant for alcohol, parties and saturated fats would not have caused much of a stir in the days of the black and white cricketer.

But to our anaemic modern world-view, in which every pleasure must be grilled, it is considered an unseemly anachronism to watch a sportsman wobbling to the crease. Samit Patel is the latest man to fall victim to the new Puritanism. His reward for breaking into the England team last summer was to be given a fitness chart. Having failed to comply with the demands of the 'health and conditioning team' he was dropped like a naughty schoolboy from the England squad in the Caribbean.

Talk of health, fitness and conditioning is of course, a polite way of saying that Samit just looks a bit too fat. What is most revealing about his case is that no mention was made of his performance on the field, surely the most significant aspect of a player's contribution. Yes, we know that limited overs cricket places greater onus on fielding and (cover your ears now Inzamam) running between the wickets. But the proof of that particular pudding should be in the eating. Patel had performed reasonably well in his brief international career. And the England selectors knew what they were getting when Patel was first selected. So why is the size of his stomach an issue now?

Other countries seem to have adopted a more pragmatic approach. Ryder is back in the New Zealand team, as bulky as ever, because frankly they are desperately short of top class batsmen, or indeed batsmen of any description. Jacques Kallis is presumably first in the queue at most barbeques, but is unlikely to find himself out on his ear if he refuses to attend his local Weight Watchers.

Shane Warne was fond of the odd meat pie, but it didn't stop him becoming one of the game's greatest ever spinners. He has made no secret of his dislike of coaches and fitness regimes and even claimed that he would have extended his Test career if he had been able to simply turn up and play without having to go through the regimented exercise rituals that players are obliged to perform before they ever get near the wicket.

And to deem those in possession of a paunch, a beer belly or a little extra padding to be cricketing non-persons, is to write off a large chunk of the sport's history. Cricket's often sedentary nature has been a forgiving environment for the larger gentleman. There is room in the annals of the sport for Gatting, Boon, Cowdrey and 'Tubby' Taylor. And we shouldn't forget either the fat man's fat man, Warwick Armstrong. Known as 'Big Ship' the twenty-two stone Australian captain led his country to eight successive Ashes victories, without a fitness coach in sight.

So kudos to Ryder for flying the flag for the ampler figure. And his belligerent century in the First Test against India was one of few bright spots for a Black Cap team who were totally outplayed by the best side in the world. It is no surprise to see Daniel Vettori's men are as high as [7.4] to level the series, with the Indians firm favourites on [2.14]. And if you fancy Jesse to repeat his Hamilton heroics, you can back him at [5.1] to be top New Zealand first innings scorer.