Bat and ball / Frank Gregan / 06 April 2009 /

Frank Gregan reflects on a historic England series win over the West Indies that owed far more to luck, bad weather, dodgy maths and a West Indies collapse than any inspired performance. The Aussies are unlikely to be so charitable...

Who would have thought that a fitting statement to bring to an end England's Caribbean tour would have been "he who laughs last" etc? Strauss and Co must have been having a right old chuckle as they flew back home safe in the knowledge that they had made history. Despite the manner of the victory all that the record books will show is that this England side became the first to win a one day series in the West Indies. A tour that was about as much fun as a hip replacement was turned on its head by a wicked spell of bowling from Andrew Flintoff. His hat-trick was spectacular but the dismissals of Simmons and Sarwan were priceless.

The players had received more flak than a Luftwaffe squadron because they had been squabbling amongst themselves and were producing some dire performances. Their camaraderie was the same as that between North and South Korea and there were more egos in the dressing room than on a Hollywood movie set, but all that has been forgiven because of a shortened game in St Lucia. Their status has changed overnight - they are now record shattering heroes one and all. What a load of pants!

The West Indies tour was a debacle and the English team looks to be in dreadful nick with only three months to go until the start of the Ashes. They squandered winning positions during the test series and paid the price - a series defeat. Their form in the one dayers ranged from ordinary to embarrassing but they won because of a dodgy piece of maths, Mssrs Duckworth and Lewis and a great spell of bowling by Freddie. Let's not kid ourselves that any corner has been turned, English cricket is still up to its neck in the smelly brown stuff, all that happened is that the law of averages kicked in and a little bit of luck came their way.

The West Indies have problems of their own with disputes over player's payments and as ever they have still to learn the difference between relaxed and collapsed! They had a great opportunity to put England to the sword but their "whatever' attitude let Strauss's men off the hook. A more ruthless side would have shown no mercy.

This summer's tourists are not renowned for their generosity or their inability to put the boot into the area where the cricket box is worn. The Australian attitude will be the polar opposite of our Caribbean cousins and even England's best may not be good enough.

Certainly, the form England showed on this latest tour will reap no rewards in the Ashes. The Aussies remain my bet of the year, keep lumping on and adding to the portfolio, Australia are currently [1.76] to win the series, a great investment!

So if not 'he who laughs last", what is a fitting epitaph for England's tour to the Caribbean? The West Indies won the Tests and the Twenty20 whilst England ended the tour on a high with their win on Friday which was a record breaker. Both sets of supporters seem to be pleased which just goes to show that as far as cricket is concerned Abraham Lincoln got it wrong - "you can fool all of the people - all of the time!"

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